Here are the random thoughts in my mind.
Recently I visited the country where I grew up. It was a rather long trip of 5 weeks and I got to spend a significant time with family and friends. Everything was nice and pleasurable; except for it didn't look real. It didn't felt like home. It was nostalgic sure but it wasn't home. I came back to the US and it felt nicer, familiar, home...
I don't know how to comprehend it because it felt nicer, familiar when I went back to the place I grew up in. It has been a decade since I left that place and things have changed. People have changed. Their thinking and living styles have changed. It reminds me of my childhood but it does not constitute a home any more.
On another front I am in the middle of a large move for me and my family. It is a cross country move and the first major move since our child. It is rather sooner than I had expected and wanted but I do not see any other choice. Things have to be packed, things have to be moved, apartments have to be cleaned and handed over, apartments have to be looked and decided up on in the new place, I have to make a short visit to the department, move has to be arranged for my car and the family. All of this has to be done within two weeks. Wife is a big help since she is taking care of all the scheduling along with a sick child.
I am taking up a position that I have dreamed about since the day I started doing science. It is a tenure track position with startup funds and my own lab-setup. I will have my own PhD students and my own equipment. I will be the director of my own lab and will be responsible for every one working in it. I will have to bring in money and teach as well. I will have to do service and learn the new ropes of tenure track position. I don't know if I am excited or scared.
Being excited and scared aren't mutually exclusive (Halloween, anyone?)!
ReplyDeletethings have changed. People have changed. Their thinking and living styles have changed. It reminds me of my childhood but it does not constitute a home any more.
ReplyDeleteI know how you feel. I don't really go back to homeland pretty much ever and when I do it all feels very surreal, like it's happening to someone else.
Congratulations on your new job again! The first year will kick your butt, and then some. You'll love it as much as you will hate it! :-)
I just returned from a few-weeks long vacation in the motherland and I completely agree with your feelings. I could use those same words to describe my experience.
ReplyDeleteGood luck with moving and starting that new position!